Monday, 10 August 2009

Monday afternoon

You know, when I was considering these weeks of post-op recovery, I did envisage that I'd be getting quite a lot done, especially with regard to knitting and blogging. This hasn't turned out to be the case at all.

This isn't because I'm too unwell, not at all - it's more because there is a lot of other stuff going on, and I cannot write about it here because it isn't my story to tell. However I can write about trying to cope with it.

I do usually find that knitting helps immensely in a stressful situation. But when things get beyond a certain point, I've found in the past that I can't knit, my thoughts just won't let me settle to it. Now I've discovered something else - that if things continue getting worse, I can knit again. In fact I find myself doing very nearly nothing but knit. Note that this doesn't imply I'm actually doing much of anything else, it's more that knitting is the only thing I am managing to do.

I'm not entirely sure that this is healthy, but at least it's a coping mechanism of sorts, and it does mean that my husband is going to end up with a new pullover in the not too far distant future, judging by recent progress.

I've finished the back of the Hemlock pullover now. There is, of course, a difference in the Peace Fleece fabric and the Patons Jet fabric - nice stuff, by the way - but my husband is entirely happy with it and I think it will look absolutely fine in wear. So I am suppressing the perfectionist in me that wants to say this just isn't good enough - and I'm going to say instead that it is perfectly ok.

There is a lot of this garment, and at this point it is hard to photograph. This is the 50" size, and the overall length is 30" - that's a good bit of knitting. So this is just the lower edge of the contrast yoke. The colours are not accurate here - the green is a deep dark forest green in real life, and the black is not faded.

I've cast on for the first sleeve, as well, but I don't think that necessarily merits a photograph just yet. More green knitting, basically.

Lucy continues to do a lot of sleeping, and not much else. Mostly she goes into her crate - her own little place - and stays there looking out at us. She has to be tempted to eat and is only taking small meals, but we don't think she is in any discomfort at all.

If one of us sits on the sofa then she will come out of her crate and get up onto the sofa to join us - we've arranged a leather floor cushion to make a sort of ramp for her, as she isn't comfortable with jumping up. Most of the time, it is just a bit too difficult for her now. She moves across to cuddle up in her usual way, and is quite happy to be stroked and made a fuss of. She still thinks she's a lap dog. In truth she isn't very big, just 10 kilos - as cocker spaniels go, she is small.

It's strange, when I look at a picture of her - like this one - I see an old dog. But when I look at Lucy rather than the picture, I don't see her as old. Just tired.


Linda said...

Its strange how our minds work when faced with stress of different levels. Hugs to you. x

karen ball said...

As ever, a beautifully understated post. And very moving. Wishing you all the best.